Gedolei Yisroel have been making statements about OTD kids for several generations. What is universal to all statements is that kiruv, not richuk, is the only approach. Many emphasized the role of tefiloh. Never, ever, stop davening for your children. The ways of Hashem are so far beyond our ability to grasp. The Steipler ZT”L was quoted as responding to the question about how there is a current influx of baalei teshuvah. He attributed this to tefilos recited by zaides and babbes even many generations ago.
If someone’s child is rejecting their obligations bein odom laMakom, that does not justify the parent abandoning their obligations bein odom lachaveiro.