Ubiquitin – This is definitely a record. I agree with everything you wrote except for the last sentence of your first post which I’m not sure about (but even that depends on exactly what you meant by it. It is somewhat ambiguous and open to interpretation).
I would also add that aside from being an inaccurate analogy, I find the musical chairs analogy to be extremely offensive and a terrible way to view the process of getting married. It is particularly offensive to girls, especially since the Torah view is that it is the guy who is supposed to be seeking his missing half and not the other way around.