“Two corrections. “most of these teens need serious physiology” You meant psychology. Lok up definitions.” – It was autocorrect
“Let’s start with a personal question. How many of your rebbeim from your elementary and high school years do you still keep contact with? If any, why not the others? Keep your answer to yourself, but it will tell you something about that rebbe that remains with you. That is real chinuch.” – in theory I agree with you however classes that have 20+ kids in them in elementary school aren’t really capable of keeping up as a rebbe to be michanech on a day to day basis. As a matter of fact even if they are physically possible to it might not be recommended to be shoel aitza from 15 rebbeim even if my pre 1A rebbe knew me very well, it’s just not practical.
“Next, there is hardly a day during which a yeshiva experience involved not a single instance of a member of the hanhala embarrassing a talmid. Yes, public shaming. Some cases might have been particularly severe, others not so dramatic. But the impact on the child can be lasting and deep” – a kid that comes from a stable home and is instilled with good self confidence can take the casual rips and embarrassment that he’ll come across in day to day life. There are exceptions and every not sensitive kid has something that gets under his skin. Thinking back to my yeshiva days I don’t remember many examples of kids getting embarrassed and bent out of shape in yeshiva.
“Again, no numbers, but close to a draw between parents and chinuch. Either way, the kid is escaping.” – my point wasn’t parents and not chinuch. In most cases of a teen going of because of a bad rebbe the parents also have a part whether it’s not giving enough support or if they’re not working with the rebbe the right way etc.
PARENTS SHOULD NOT BE WAITING FOR ISSUES TO POP UP TO BEGIN SPEAKING TO THEIR CHILD’S REBBE!! all the professional mechanchim agree with this
To sum up, of all my classmates that I had that went otd, b”h all are back and all are happily married to a frum girl. They never went back to becoming a mainstream yeshiva bachur and they’re all modern and not “black hatters”. All these guys besides one went otd because of parental issues besides one that had bad friends. That’s just a minority but having spoken to them I got the impression that alot of their friends went otd because of parental issues also!