Reply To: Working boys and shidduchim

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Phil
Participant

“It hurt so much being in yeshiva, watching many of my friends learning and enjoying it…”

Schneubs.

The fact that this hurt speaks volumes about you. Commit yourself to learning daily, daven for “Veha’arev”, sweetness in Torah and it will be granted to you. What your friends are doing may or may not be the right path for them but you have to do what works for you and be happy with it. Sometimes, the best bochurim in yeshiva don’t consider that full-time learning may not be for them because they enjoy it so much and are doing what everyone else is doing. When they finally do realize and are suddenly burdened with the heavy yoke of earning a livelihood, bitterness sets in and they never learn a word. Having a chavrusa is helpful because knowing that he’s waiting for you pushes you to learn, even though you may be exhausted from school or from work.

If you don’t feel the push to start dating right now, you may want to finish your courses and start working before you do so. This will set you on your chosen path and help you to really feel confident in yourself, which will make it easier to find your life-partner. You can see that the entire YWN Coffee Room is rooting for you and wishes you much hatzlacha!