” Its a different style of Judaism than what I was raised on and I dislike it. It feels fake.”
True and again true. So why look on the bad side?
There are many true role models you can learn from.
Lets keep it simple, the non-frum world out there is by far NOT better.
Whatever you are looking for – you will CERTAINLY not find by going elsewhere.
Truth and Emes Yidishkeit is NOT defined by ones dress-code etc, you need to work on it.