Depends on where you live. If you are born and raised and live in Boropark, Marine Park (still in Brooklyn) is way out there. If you are in Lakewood, then you consider the 5 Towns to be in town.
As an outsider, I break it down like this. If the average community member feels a responsibility to build and contribute, to be the core of your community because without you the community won’t be the same, then you are out of town. If you feel missed if you aren’t there, then you are out of town. If you feel pride in every growth and milestone for your community, every new family moving in, you are out of town.
If you are just another face in the crowd, you are in town. If you see yourself as different rather than as part of, you are out of town. If you see your neighbor as an “other” and not as an extension of your family, you are in town.
See, it’s not really about where you live. It’s about how you live.