Some thoughts
I need that my children keep shabbos. After that I need them to love shabbos too.
Now I know that those are not mutually exclusive , and In normal situations the more they love it the more they will keep it, but if it’s necessary to choose, whenever that may be, (hopefully never)
It’s more important to keep it.
(I know, if they love it they will come back if they hate it they will leave later. Who says? Maybe he they love it without keeping it they will feel OK with that status but if they keep it even while hating it they will grow to love it. Either way I’m only musing)
As to Josef’s main arguments
It’s an interesting thing.
Anecdotally speaking, corporal punishment seems to have been the standard method of discipline throughout the ages across all spectrum of Judaism. So of course there are multiple sources that will be major proponents of it.
What needs explanation is what and why has that changed.
Yes I’m familiar with the quote from rabbi wolbe. But why has that become holy grail?
I quoted above from rabbi miller who was staunchly pro justified smacking for chinuch .
He certainly was big enough to argue on rabbi wolbe
I’m not taking a position here. I’m musing.
Thousands of years of chinuch, and then a change in the last thirty years, one certainly has a right to wonder