The yeshivish world is an exercise in self-delusion.
Someone makes sure his teenage daughter’s friends remain separate and do not speak or look at the boys in the house, yet thinks this gives the boys “some idea of how girls are”. Self-delusion. The boys and girls should not “mix” (have an actual conversation?) “but we may need to do a better job educating our boys about how life is realistically. ” Good luck with that.
Blaming the shadchanim but constructing the system so that the shadchanim control it is self-delusional.
Telling the boys that the world continues to exist b’zchus their Torah learning, and allowing them to pick out the best physical specimen available as their eishes chayil is self-delusional.