It does not say in Kedoshim you are not allowed to hate. It says, don’t keep your hatred bottled up in your heart but tell him about it which will resolve the hatred as the Rashbam points out. If you hate him without telling him about it is sinas chinom as the Yad Yosef on the Ein Yaakov Yoma 9, indicates. The reason you should not him is as the Sefer Hachinuch under lo sukam, don’t take revenge,says because he is only a shaliach of Hashem who is not directly causing your grief.
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