Reply To: Can you erase my messages I mean your messages, I mean my…

daas-“Ugh, why did this conversation turn nasty?”

-quite simple, ubiquitin wanted to share with us that he can only think dirty.
(ubiquitin-“why is t 80% of what you are saying stuff that you wouldn’t want a record of?
Even 20% seems like too much”)

ubiquitin-“But it did help me understand the op , his question , and why 80% of his texts are things he doesn’t want a record of”

-so you are saying that it only took 3 responses for you to finally understand that not everyone’s mind is that sick? Great ; )

daas-“Regarding the OP, I don’t think you “own” the messages you’ve sent, and I think it’s a bit odd to even request they be deleted, but it might be appropriate to tell the person you sent it to that in retrospect, you wish you hadn’t sent it.”

-yes you dont own the messages which are on the other phone, however who does own them? Can we say that the network or app owns them? I mean after all they are the ones collecting your data even if you delete it. So in that case maybe your friend who youve sent the message to doesnt own it either. But its not about who owns it, its the fact that its your content. I mean if you only had a momentary conversation over text, what reason would the other party have for keeping it if what you wrote to them previously doesnt hold for the future since it was only meant for that moment. What if you sent someone a funny video of yourself to cheer them up for the moment they were sad, but now it is saved forever and can possibly circulate elsewhere? Now do you understand the concept of how some things are meant to be momentary but we use texting which is a great way to send material, but the drawback is that its saved. Would that also be an “odd” request on your part to ask them to delete it?

Personally I dont like clutter. That includes digital clutter which includes conversation and messaging threads. So I basically delete messages daily. Thats one reason. The other reason I delete is especially if there were some negative conversations, even though you move past it the messages are still there. And I noticed that if I ever go over them again on some other occasion, I see those messages and am reminded of that negative moment and it gives a sense of being in that moment again, forgetting that you have moved past that. Most people dont realize that when you look at past things you actually get absorbed into them especially messages,emails, pictures and so on.

Ya maybe its odd to ask someone to delete your conversations, but what reason does someone have to keep them especially if they know you would rather the conversation not be saved?
Would it be odd for you to request that they delete a picture in which you dont look too flattering, or at least crop you out? I mean ya its in their possession but the topic is you.

Again, personally I am not a collector of things except for money and mitzvos the (former in order to use) ; ) so maybe to me its less of an issue to delete messages. I guess its the actual request of asking someone to do something on their own phone which I can see is a bit intrusive. And thats the dilemma.