Gadolhadorah,
“If you believe the snake oil salesmen … and still leave enough money to go out and buy a a hand-raised, free range chicken for Kaparos and a $500 Calabrian esrog for Succos. Hamayvin yavin. “
An explanation for those who don’t understand you might be good here, because it looks like you are mocking those who do hiddur mitzvah, and I hope I’m interpreting wrong.