UJM – it is possible to have hakaras hatov and also “have taainas.”. There are a number of comments here that attempt to oversimplify complex issues.
Having an ongoing meaningful relationship with anyone requires a level of accountability. The idea that because parents start off so far “up” in terms of giving to the relationship that they have nearly unlimited “get out of jail free” cards seems (to me) to be wrong, and a terrible way to view relationships.
