A. This issue may be more of a problem outside kollel. Even if it’s equal, it would require leaders from across the spectrum to solve it.
B. It would be proper for the kids to refuse it. With some exceptions. But that is on the individuals. Which depends on those guiding them in shidduchim. That leads into C.
C. Those that live in a solid neighborhood will mostly answer the local Rav. A large amount will answer the senior Rabbanim. I think your wrong on this one. A large majority of kolleliet have someone to go to. For the wives or the working fathers, not nearly as much. That’s a real issue.
D. In twenty minutes a day, they cover the whole Mishna Berurah every couple of years. If you mean a serious three hour Seder, why is that the standard of really knowing? How many start off still learning 8-12 blatt a Seder? A lot. Especially if yeshiva is doing a misechta they missed. But it quickly changes. At five years, those that are doing a few blatt a Seder three times a day, are a tiny percentage. And it’s almost exclusively those that are mentally but out for it.
E. My dear fellow poster, nobody is more aware of the issues than me. It’s a big factor in why I’m so far out of the system. Why is the Yeshiva so uninformed, as well as non idealistic? To me it seems like the yeshiva boy of yesteryear seamlessly interacted with his college and blue collar, friends, neighbors, and relatives. That doesn’t seem to happen anymore. The Yeshiva is really nervous about outside influences. That makes sense. It is their cornerstone. But when it comes to mature adults, the influence flows the other way. From inside the Yeshiva to out. In a positive way. Lakewood did not do a good job of promoting inter-lifestyle friendships within their expanding borders. So the non yeshiva crowd, has their own society. And it promotes the influences that the Yeshiva is so worried about.
With these last lines, I wrote you one solution.