Reply To: Cherem Rabbeinu Gershom

So here’s a Halachic question based on the above conversation:

One of the major provisions of Cherem Rabbeinu Gershom is that a husband cannot divorce his wife unless his wife wants to get divorced. Rabbeinu Gershom decreed that if a wife wishes to remain married, then the husband has no choice but to remain married to her. (Much as the husband has that equivalent right directly under Torah Law; whereas if he desires to remain married to his wife, then his wife is not entitled to a divorce even if she wants one.)

Of course in both sets of circumstances there are exceptions to the rule, and a spouse may be entitled to a divorce even if the other spouse doesn’t want to divorce. (Except by Sephardim and other non-Ashkenazim the husband, presumably, can divorce his wife against her will [since only Ashkenazim are subject to CRG.]) But, by default, barring extenuating circumstances where there is a clearly defined and proven Halachic justification for an involuntary divorce, the spouse desiring to maintain and continue the marriage prevails over the spouse desiring to divorce.

So my question, given the above, is when in fact is a husband entitled to a Heter Meah Rabbonim based on the fact that his wife declined to accept the divorce he wanted to give her? Rabbeinu Gershom specifically gave the wife the right to decide to refuse to accept a divorce from her husband.