I recommend R. Aryeh Carnel’s “siyata legamara,” known as the “little white book” in yeshivos. It has a great list of common terms which if memorized, make learning gemara a lot easier.
Also, slow down a lot. You’re not mechuyav to do daf or amud yomi; I found with myself and my talmidim that the more times you go over the gemara, or the sefer you’re learning, the clearer it becomes both in translation and pshat.
What might have come to you quicker in your yeshiva/kolel days might take longer now, if your mind is on other things, but be patient with yourself.
You also need to completely clear your mind of other considerations when you approach your seder; when you were in yeshiva, most likely the only thing you had to worry about was whether or not the cook would serve one of the “bad suppers” that every yeshiva has, forcing you to order pizza if you wanted a meal that evening. I’m exaggerating, as everyone has a “pekel,”but in general, a yeshiva bochurs mind is a lot clearer than when one needs to go to work. So before you start, picture yourself in beis medrash with nothing but the blatt gemara mattering to you. Your work is done, your mortgage and car are paid, your kids and wife are asleep, your boss gave you a paid sabbatical – there’s nothing that you need to do now but this seder.
The chofetz chaim says there’s a remez to this on the pasuk of vehayu hadvarim hae’leh – a person might think, there’s so much to learn! How can i even begin? So the pasuk says ha’eleh – only these words, this daf,this sugya, only this matters now, then the yatzer hora tells you all of your daagos, and for this, the pasuk says hayom – only today, only this seder exists,, nothing else.