Joseph says, “the rule is the couple follows the minhugim of the Choson”
Not everything I say is an invitation for controversy. Sometimes I just want to make an observation.
The Rav was giving an eitza tova to avoid machlocas.
The same thing perhaps if it were your minhag to have a “mitzva tantz” for your daughter and not my minhag, so I would have the “tantz” even though it goes against my minhag to b’davka not have one.
The same if I planned to have some wine on the tables and you liked a bar in addition to the wine. Joseph, for you I would spring for the bar.
Joseph, you said “Rosh Yeshiva families with mixed seating and no mechitzas”? Which Rosh Yeshivos?
Until recently, all the foremost Yeshivas had mixed seating at their annual fundraising dinners. And even now they have a few mixed seating tables for family and business associates of large donors. Is there a halachic dispensation for guests of honor?