thank you all- there was a lot of food for thought and beautiful answers given to teen’s question.
teen- it’s far from bad or unusual to have these questions. That’s why there are many books on the subject; Books that answer to the needs and doubts of teenagers (and others). It’s worth your while to pick one up and read it through. It will lay many doubts to rest; you will feel much better and RELIEVED
I know you probably want that perfect, quick answer that settles everything. Don’t be lazy and start reading. We, here in the CR, can not possibly give you the full picture or a complete answer. You’ll just get bits and pieces- you will not feel content
I hope I didn’t come across too strong. But just from looking back at my OWN teenage years- you want something quick, easy, simple. But deep questions that encompass the entire purpose and workings of the world can not be answered “al regel achas” (literal translation: on one foot)
Much hatzlocha and success! Have a wonderful shabbos