“but because he is trying to preserve his religious state of mind in the way he dresses”
Jewess, he is not only doing what you say. He is also trying to preserve MY religious mind, by thinking that I am not dressing up to his higher standard, and am in need of “fixing.” What he really wants is to see ALL Jews dress like he does, and if they do not, he thinks (as apparently now do you) that he is on a higher madreiga. Who says so????? Maybe the higher level is to take the beautiful colors that Hashem put into this world and wear them!!!! Maybe He WANTS us to make ourselves attractively attired, and be in comfortable clothing, so that when we are learning, we do not think about how hot we might be, sitting in a black suit and hat learning (well, the guys, anyway). Maybe it’s a GOOD thing to actually be physically comfortable enough to enjoy learning in any environment, even on a hot summer day.
I do not find it admirable if someone knowingly dresses in a way that is not mandated by halacha m’Sina and sets himself up for a heat stroke, in order to merely fit into someone else’s religious cookie cutter ideology that teaches him he should feel prouder of himself for doing that than not doing it. That is not what Yiddishkeit is supposed to be about, and anyone who disagrees with me, has every right to do so, but respectfully, I truly believe some people have lost sight of what we are supposed to be, as a nation. I respectfully also disagree with the idea that the way we dress says “about the way we are.” There are people who are totally untzniusdig (by our minimal standards)in their dress style, who have hearts of gold and I would stack them up against a dozen rabbis. There are people dressed in the most chassidish of garb who are complete behaimas, and I do not mean that they have committed crimes, they are simply boorish. One thing has nothing to do with the other. It is an external manifestation and nothing more. Yes, there are standards of dress that one should follow in order to not fall into the traps that lie in wait for many of us. It is harder for someone dressed cleanly and neatly in clothing that basically covers most of their body, to commit acts of immorality, but that is also no guarantee of protection, unless the person has internalized those feelings.
I respect, admire, and feel inspired by people who are good, honest, honorable people, who spend their lives in trying to do chessed and bringing a tikun to this world. I do not respect, admire, and feel inspired by people whose sole aim in life seems to be to divisively show off how righteous they believe themselves to be, as compared to another person who may be equally righteous but doesn’t have to show off about it. The fact that a girl does or does not wear a jeans skirt says absolutely zip about her middos and love of Torah. A boy who wears a sweater over his shirt and not a jacket, may be more learned, and more spiritually connected to Hakadosh Baruch Hu, than a Kollel boy. Anyone who thinks otherwise, has proved my point. They are already judging someone for the wrong reasons.
Jewess, I am not Yeshivish – but I try very hard to always be a religiously observant Jewish woman. I do not consider you to be less so, even if you dress differently. I ask about three things when I want to know if someone is frum. Does the person totally keep Shabbos, do they keep strictly kosher, and if married, do they keep Taharas Hamishpacha? If those three criteria are met,they are frum, as far as I am concerned. I presume the men are davening three times a day and putting on tefillin in the morning. Yes, there are different levels, but all fall within the parameters of Yiddishkeit. And it will only be after 120 years that we will truly know what level was the “higher madreiga.” Is a nazir on a higher madreiga than a Jew who follows the halacha and does drink wine and cut his hair and nails? Or is he actually on a negative madreiga, because he clearly needed to become a nazir in order to prevent himself from sinning? Isn’t that why he has to bring a korban at the end of his nazirus? So who is the real tzaddik? Hashem tells us “V’chai Bahem,” one explanation of which is that we have to experience LIFE while doing the mitzvos. Anyone can deny himself, live like the Puritans or Ascetics. It is the one who lives life as the “Yom K’Purim,” who is on the higher madreiga. OK, off my soapbox, now.