Jaymatt I must have misunderstood – sincere apologies. I thought you were asking if it is correct to inform the other party regarding looks or intellegence if the shidduch has been dropped for these reasons.
Even as a shadchan and I have been involved in several over the years, you should not comment on either of the above for reasons I stated previously.
As a shadchan when I have been faced with he/she is not on my level and I cannot hold a deep/intellegant conversation or he/she is not good looking enough, I did not repeat this but said that they were sorry but they were not going further with the shidduch as they felt it would not progress into anything or it was not going in the direction they had hoped.
The reasons people drop a shidduch are always useful for further suggestions but intellegence or looks?
Someone may be looking for Mr/Miss Brain of the World They meet someone who did not finish College but has so much common sense and is so streetwise that it is a perfect match. The next person hates red heads. Meets someone so fabulous that they say red heads? who cares what colour the hair is? So although I agree in theory with people’s likes and dislikes as being informative I do not use them as set in steel.