Areivim, I hear your concerns. As I mentioned before, I never believed that evolution was mathematically possible. However, the issue you raise of kids with shailas can go two ways. On one hand we don’t want to raise questions in the mind of children. But on the other hand, the reality is that many kids have questions on their own. If we stifle all talk of evolution, then some kids who can’t get answers may leave the fold. Most kids these days are too sophisticated to simply listen to someone telling them they are not allowed to ask, or that all scientists are fools and liars. For those kids, I think that R. Slifkin’s approach is a life-saver. For other kids, it may be detrimental. I think the key is we must be honest with our kids. If they have questions, then we can tell them that there are Torah approaches to dealing with these matters which do not involve negating current scientific thought in any way.
As an aside, my own hashkafa is that the RBSH gave us the Torah for only one reason which is to teach us how to live in shalom with each other and appreciate every yid. All the other details are secondary (as per Hillel). So it matters not a hoot whether there were dinosaurs or not. Teach the kids to appreciate the warmth and kindness of the Torah, and the friendship and fun of having so many relatives (extended family). They will not want to stray if this message is constantly reinforced. You can tell them that in public school, there can be the most vicious taunting by classmates of any random child. It happens all the time. It does not generally happen in any yeshiva in which midos are the core. It is one big happy family. Most yeshiva kids have happy memories of school, which I have read is not at all the case in public school.
When a child is made to understand that this is the ikar of yiddishkeit, he will realize how fortunate he is to have teachers and classmates that care about him, because they learned that from Avraham Avinu. Similarly, if it is stressed that the discipline of learning Torah has led to Jewish success in many other areas as well, he will develop a sense of pride in his religion. All this positive is what keeps kids on the derech. I don’t believe that taking a negative, sarcastic approach to the outside world or to scientists is the approach that is most likely to lead to a lifelong commitment. This is why I always say the RBSH gave us the Torah for our sake, not for his ego.
I always used to believe that the fossils don’t show anything, because they would find a small bone fragment, and construct a model 100 feet tall. However, I am indebted to R. Slifkin for alerting me to the possibility that we should consider the evidence honestly and unbiased, because it doesn’t contradict the Torah either way. If there are enough bones to really piece together a dinosaur, then fine; if there seem to be too few, and too much personal creativity on the part of the modeler, then that’s also fine. Let us just look for the emes.