PT: sounds like you are taking the postition that there are rougly the same amount of older girls and guys.
True girls go to shadchanim SOONER than guys. However by the time the guys hit 27,28 – on shidduch island 5 yrs- the shadchanim have by and large heard of them.
Jothar: “The question is your insistence that one who doesn’t do so is meshamed klal yisroel.”
I don’t recall ever having said that or anything resembling such. I have and continue to encourage that we should have more close in age shidduchim than we have had in the past.
What I am saying is we are OBLIGATED to use our saychel and take reasonable actions to prevent and alleviate problems that we find ourselves in. The more serious the problem the more willing we must be to take even somewhat difficult actions.
What constitutes reasonable action? That can be debated and guidance from our leaders is absolutely necessary. I for one don’t think trying to encourage more close in age shiddcuhim is that radical. (throwing the girls in the river is).
My Beliefs:
Yes, I believe HASHEM runs the world.
NO, I don’t believe hashem wants all 23 year olds to date 19 year olds and therefore cause many many girls to be stuck.
Yes, I belive Hashem gives us free choice and the fact the he runs the world doesn’t preclude our ability to mess things up royally by our actions.
Yes, I believe in people being responsible for their actions and to the community.
No, I don’t believe in blaming Hashem for problems that are self created (albeit unwittingly).