to zalman, you ask for mekoros on war and women.
First, I must correct you about what you wrote that “(today)there is no milchemet mitzvah bayom hazeh”. The rambam that you keep on quoting (hilchos melochim, fifth perek, first mishneh) CLEARLY writes that “ezras yisroel miyad tzar sheboh aleihem” as a milchemet mitzvah, just like milchemet amolek and shiva ammamim. “To help Jews from the enemy that is attacking them”. This is the QUINTESSENTIAL milchemet mitzvah. I submit that, today, when the enemies of Israel are so intent in destroying us in Eretz Ysroel and elsewhere, the defense of jews in the world is surely a milchemet mitzvah.
For this, the mishneh says “afilu chosson mechuposio,vekallah mechpusso”. Apart from the obvious symmetry here ,that clearly suggests that both go out to war together,you will not find any Possek who gives the explanation that you give on “kallah mechupusso”.(only the reshash ,as metioned, does that. I do not see a Radvaz on that)
Let’s move on to the Minchas Chinuch- who does say what you said, that the mitzvah of “mechyias amolek'” does not apply to women because men are the ones who wage war.
Well, I wish you had looked at the MINCHAS CHINUCH on that mitzvah who clearly says that this is ‘daas jochid” and that the Rambam paskens differently. He adds(his words); “because in truth, in a milchemet mitzvah, ALL go out to war, even a bride..etc”.
Well, I have only brought down the mishneh and the Rambam and I daresay you will find few Poskim who agree with the Chinuch, as shown by the words of the Minchas Chinuch.
I look forward to your comments.I have other interesting rayos if you so require.