Reply To: Children at a Second Marriage

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Wolf, Just wondering, why could you not have gone to everything but the chuppa?

If I did that, I would have missed most of it. Keep in mind that this wasn’t your typical frum wedding. It was a very small affair in a relative’s back yard with a very small crowd. It’s not like there were 400 people and a four-hour party to follow.

In any event, I refer you back to the point where my father wanted me there — heck, he asked me to hold one of the poles of the chuppah — and kibbud av, IMHO, clearly trumps any other consideration (except, possibly kibbud am — but, as I pointed out earlier, that wasn’t an issue by me). My father is not frum and he would not have understood if I told him “there a custom not to attend…” and it also might have jeopardized our reconciliation, which was at a delicate stage then.

The Wolf