I think this is depened on a case by case basis, Am I looking for A shidduch, a Chavrusa or a place to eat?
For me the most important point is that I know where I stand I know I have certain goals and targets that I set for myself. I might not always reach them, but it is where I feel I belong.
I would expect this from all Yidden, and therefore neither judge nor label them.
I will have to make a judgement call on various issues from time to time as they come up. But I try not too let these interfere with how I think about them.
Lastly the question of who is “right” and who is “wrong” is one that I cannot answer. I can just accept people for what they are.