Reply To: Tznius Support Group PLEASE WOMEN ONLY, even reading

Plonis: Glad to hear it 😉

If you are asked to go outside unexpectedly, and need to put on tights, it may be best if you do not frame the issue as a tznius one, but instead say, “I’m more comfortable wearing tights”. To add to this, maybe instead just say, “I’m coming right away! I just need to go to the bathroom first!” You don’t have to necessarily tell them it’s to put on your tights!

But I also think what SJSinNYC says makes sense, too. However, that kind of conversation really should be a private one between you and your parents, not in front of others. And you have to really be careful how you speak to them. Don’t make it sound like you are putting their standards down or that you are better than them. You will just get an angry or defensive response from them. The emphasis needs to be on working things out between the two issues. For example, “Ma, Ta, can we talk about this? I really want to help you and I also really want to keep this kabbalah that I made. How can we work this out?” A respectful tone will also be important in that type of conversation.