I think Jothar makes a very important point about chassidish couples not expecting to be soulmates. And I wonder if that’s the way it was for everyone up until a few generations ago, and that’s why there were less divorces. Looking back at my grandparents, I don’t think either set was too blissfully married, but I don’t think divorce was ever considered as an option either. Marriage was looked at as a commitment for life, as it should be, except in extreme circumstances. Between wars, sickness and everything, I wonder if they didn’t even necessarily expect to be happily married. It was enough not to be completely miserable.
So I don’t know if we’re better off today when we expect our spouses to be our best friends. When it works out, it’s beautiful. But when it doesn’t, an entire family could be broken up if people don’t view marriage as a lifetime commitment.
This is my personal theory but I think there’s some truth to it.