Some things in Judaism are not black and white, even though the frum society today tries very hard to make it that way. I agree that banning guests is ridiculous but at the same time I have seen (and experienced) many cases where there was actually a real problem. So where do we draw our lines? Do we just have to know ourselves and be honest with ourselves if it applies to us or not? I teach non-religious college students and sadly the answer I give most commonly throughout the day is “Don’t judge judaism by the jews..” They ask me about morality in Judaism and all the issues and problems in Orthodox society and I have to say, Judaism is beautiful..the Jews..sometimes not so much. It makes me nauseous and its embarrassing that this is the answer I have to give. Yes, I understand we are human and make mistakes..no one is perfect, not me you, the gadol hador or Moshe Rabbeinu..but even though Moshe made mistakes you can see what he lived for, his essence, his higher, purposeful way of living. If we lived the ways Jews were meant to live we won’t need to have blanket bans, and takanos that get stranger by the year, and as many issues in marriage, and parenting, and dating as we do now. Start living in a way that allows people to judge Judaism by the Jews.
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