Reply To: Children and Prizes–Hindering Intrinsic Self Worth

bein_hasdorim–I’m not convinced that a cheap junky prize a day will have long lasting effects on keeping them pumped on yiddishkeit and good behavior. At a certain point they need to be weaned off the prizes so they can have some internal compass leading them towards self fulfillment. We’re not training l’havdil dogs here to just comply with what’s being taught, and then they’ll get a treat.

They have a yetzer hora and yetzer tov, and with love and discipline blended properly, with a balance of positive reinforcement, then they can become stronger despite the weakening of generations.

I brought this up because of what I have been witnessing across the board within school systems and homes, and I definitely see a handicap. I even see the kids that DO get rewarded for every little thing developing an apathy towards certain parts of yiddishkeit. That shows a lack in proper chinuch and an overdose on prizes which deprives them of the joy and sweetness felt in accomplishing from within.

Chanoch l’na’ar al pi darko is for all generations. A great mechanech paraphrased that and said Chanoch l’na’ar al pi DORO—it is incumbent upon us to recognize the generation we live in, and be honest with the weaknesses. I just feel there are other ways to do it, which requires innovation, hard work, love, discipline and understanding……and giving a prize for each little thing is the lazy way out.