Reply To: Pay the Attempted Shadchan?

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#672640
AZ
Participant

hello99: Your are SO correct.

It’s unbelievable how ppl can’t give the shadchan thier due. Certainly if a shadchan was grossly negligent then they should be held accountable. To think that even a slight percentage of shalom bayins issues it due to the shadchan is so utterly ridiculous to even have a conversation about.

Dear KiloBear_

Here’s an idea. Ask rabbonim who are familiar with shalom bayis issues and see how many come back to the shadchan being negligent. last I checked in the many articles speeches etc. on the topic, your point didn’t even crack the top 100 causes of shalom bayis issues. I guess you just know better.

It seems like the shadchan is now expected to be a mind reader, therapist, prophet, and ensure their marriage is blissful. Get realistic.

All a shadchan can do is attempt to arrange a date between two seemingly compatible people. The individuals and their families need to do due diligence.

People who think that to accomplish the goal of

a)coming up with an appropriate suggestion

b)encouraging both sides to give it a shot

c) getting two seemingly compatible people to go out on a 3 dates

is consistently easy-

they obviously haven’t haven’t gotten 5 shidduchim going in the last year.