Reply To: Shidduchim and Outside People “Helping”

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anuran
Participant

I’ve always believed that Hashem should give us direction. That bit where He told Adam “By the sweat of your brow will you eat until you are in the ground” is a pretty clear indication that none of us is exempt from earning a living. If our greatest Sages include day laborers, woodcutters, shepherds, vineyard workers – they are being completely accurate when they call it “backbreaking labor” – and doctors we shouldn’t be too proud to do the same. Nor fail to listen to them when they say “A man should first learn a trade, plant a vine, build a house and only then seek a wife” or “He who fails to teach his son a trade teaches him to steal.”

If one is fortunate enough to spend a life in full-time Torah study he should thank his Maker for the privilege.

If you can’t? There’s no shame and a great deal of honor in honest work and fulfilling mitzvot like feeding your family and making them happy. And there is a great deal of shame in forcing your wife to beg and your children to go hungry when you could have provided for them.

If you are there for your children and give them the time and attention they need to become good Jews and menschen can you really say your time was wasted? If your labor allows you to give tzedakah that changes or saves a life shouldn’t you thank Hashem that you were allowed to serve in that way?

If the hours you can spend studying Torah are few it makes them all the sweeter. There may not be as many lessons learned, but I can guarantee they will be learned more thoroughly and with greater devotion.