Reply To: Shidduchim and Outside People “Helping”

To say to someone still single at 25+ years that she is not davening enough (or talking too much loshon hara, or not doing enough chessed, or giving too little tzedaka, etc.) is unimaginably cruel, a real onaas devarim. Some people need to learn the lesson that their own words may come back to haunt them, someday, and therefore they should be very circumspect about what they say to people who are in a tzora. And saying that they “mean well” is a copout. Sometimes they do, and sometimes they are unconsciously flaunting their own good fortune in telling someone something “for her own good.”