Item Cost / Month
Rent $ 1,200
Rebbie $ 4,200
Food ($3 / day) $ 1,500
Teachers $ 1,200
Support Staff $ 1,000
Administration $ 800
In the school my boys go / went to, many of the parents could not pay even close to $4000, so asking $4.5k – $5k as a base tuition is not only a reasonable request, its probably the only way they can keep the doors open. The gap (which there must surely be) gets raised on the outside.
Your numbers were pretty much in sync with what I had in mind, with a few minor adjustments:
salary $ 150,000
after tax $ 112,500
max tuition $ 16,875
maaser $ 8,500
transp. $ 7,200
food $ 17,000
rent $ 30,000
clothing $ 2,000
utilitis $ 10,000
med $ 1,500
misc $ 5,000
total expenses $ 98,075
balance $ 14,425
5) The daycare cost vs being a stay-at-home mom is a situation that I was never in, so its unfair for me to comment on it. But in the end, its probably a wash, so either way the numbers are unchanged.
With careful budgeting, the $150k family can just make it thru the summer as well. Not each kid to sleepaway, or Bungalow plus sleepaway, but they can make it (I do, and on a lot less than $150k)
The things you list are not necessities; schooling is, so we (the rich) need to help the not so rich afford the necessities. A new shaitel is not a necessity. (Though I might be on the same page with you when it comes to Uman J)
At the end of the day, when all is said an done, lets remember this: Hashem gives some of us greater resources, and He expects us to help out those who (for whatever reason) were given less. I for one, am very happy to be in the 1st group!