I haven’t read through all the posts yet, so I may be reiterating what someone else has already posted. I think in general we are raising children wo believe that the only thing in life that is important is for them to be happy. We are so worried about their self-esteem that we are actually raising them in a way that predisposes them to having self-esteem issues.
When we were kids, our parents told us to “suck it up,” (well, not in those words, but you get the idea). If we fell down, we had to get right up. maybe with a little kiss on the booboo. If we were yelled at in class, we, not the teacher, were ALWAYS at fault. Though we were urged to always do our best, our best HAD to be better than we were trying to do. We were not coddled in the same way as kids are today. That’s a fact. So when things did not go our way, were were not “allowed” to act overly sensitively. There were fewer kids OTD in my neighborhood, and I suspect that those who were, did not get that way because someone hurt their feelings.
That being said, we do have such a problem today and it has to be addressed properly. Maybe the way to start is to worry more about our children’s actions, than their feelings amd call them on it. Being a responsible human thing builds their character. And even better, it helps build better self-esteem.