Hashemlovesme, if you are looking for shorter term Kollel (a few years), its very doable provided you have a job that can support you plus the approximate number of children you can have in that span of time.
Also, it would be prudent to find a guy with a plan – like learning full time but taking classes at night (my BIL did this). This way at the end of whatever time you are talking, your husband could start earning a living right away rather than go through initial training. Its a lot harder to stop what you are doing for school when you have 3 children to support.
Shan,
Putting government benefits aside (which I think is unethical to take because you want it rather than need it, but read my past posts on that), it ultimately affects your neighbors in more ways than you realize.
Tuition? My cousins are a long term Kollel family – he is still learning after all these years and his oldest just came back from seminary. How do they do it? They get scholarships for school, scholarships for camp, reductions on everything thats even possibly negotiable. Did you read about the Yeshivas closing due to financial considerations?
So yes, if you are self supporting 100%, go for it! Otherwise, realize that you are forcing others to sacrifice for Torah, not necessarily you.
My friend’s parents support her 100%. They are wealthy. They support her with a living wage including things like tuition. She isn’t affecting the community negatively.