Smile E. Face
Sadly the teens at risk problem and otd problem has gotten really out of hand. I cant comment on what you read on that book but rest assured the problem is huge and many of the best homes are suffering.
You mentioned that you have questions and that you dont always do the right thing. Dont worry, you sound like a normal Jewish teenager. When I was a teen I was plagued by many questions. Like you, I didnt want to turn to my Rabbeim so I started reading. I read many books on Hashkafa and that saved me.
I have a few suggestions that can make a huge difference for you.
1. Theres a website called http://asktherabbi.org/
It is a Gateways website where they have Rabbis who answer any question emailed in to the service. They get back to you within 24 hours. Try it out. It is 100% anonymous. You dont have to tell them your name. What I would suggest is that when you ask your questions or at least the first few times preface with a short intro about your background so they know they are talking to a frum girl and not a non frum person with questions…
You can ask anything pertaining to any Jewish topic. I have asked on Chumash, Gemara, Halacha, Hashkafa…they will answer any question you ask even those having to do with topics that your teachers would never discuss so dont be afraid. If you dont understand an answer ask again and say you didnt understand whatever point it was and they will help you with that too…Its an amazing service and 100% free. (Although im sure they wouldn’t mind if you donate if they have helped you!)
2. Check out http://kiruv.com/ they have 100’s of articles discussing many Jewish topics including all the famous Hashkafa questions. You will certainly find answers to many of your questions there.
3. You can do some reading to educate yourself. Id recommend first reading
1.THE GARDEN OF EMUNAH
A PRACTICAL GUIDE TO LIFE
Its an amazing book and has helped many 1000’s of people improve their Emuna and come closer to Hashem.
2. What the Angel Taught You by Rabbi N. Weinberg and Rabbi Y. Salomon
These are both amazing books that will have a very powerful impact on your life. Once you have read those you will be in good spiritual shape. After that you can check the book list on Kiruv.com and see what interests you.
Hatzlacha Rabbah and please, dont push your questions off. Get them answered as soon as possible.