another thing about the term “bashert”
the bashert that is for the neshama, that a bas kol comes out forty days before yetziras havlad…
a person CAN miss that bashert, and have an unbelievable shalom bayis with someone else they married.
on the other hand, someone can marry their real bashert and have a horrible shalom bayis.
in short, the shalom bayis of the couple has nothing to do with it being the real bashert or not.