On “the Am I wrong on this” I was going to ask: Is this in Brooklyn?
I held back because it could be taken as LHR against the community, but the common root and toeles is this: Living in any large city community leads to a degree of anonymity, and the anonymity can lead to shamelessness. In our weak generation, it is wise to be on guard for this pitfall. Perhaps the institution of universally teaching Mussar from young age would help.