lgbg,
I asked about who mended his shirts because I think most men can & should learn how to sew on a button. So should most women, though, so you are right that his wife should have known how to also.
ThinkBIG,
The term “colored” & the n-word were also originally descriptive terms. Nevertheless, because of how these terms were used over the years, they are considered racial epiphets today. Similarly, given that African-Americans may have unpleasant associations with the term “shvartze” (though not to the same degree), I’d avoid using it as well. In general, I consider it appropriate to use the most neutral (meaning connotation-free) terms possible when referring to someone of another racial/ ethnic/ religious group.
Practically, it makes sense to folow these rules in private as well, because it avoids bad habits. And obviously if one has young children this is especially important.