As someone who lost a child, I can tell you that there was nothing anyone could tell me at that time that would make me feel better. I needed people around me for support, but I was not interested in what anyone had to say. Not that I had to be a tzadekes if Hashem chose me for this nisayon, not that my other kids will be my nechama, nothing. It took some time before I was actually able to listen and find comfort in what people told me. Even then there were those who said things that were somewhat insensitive (unintentionally, of course), but I was able to reach out and hold onto other people’s words for chizuk. But as I said, that took some time. When it’s still so fresh, all you can do is be there for them.
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