My son’s rebbie accused him of something in fifth grade, that even when the real culprit admitted that he was the guilty party and that my son was absolutely innocent of any type of wrongdoing, the rebbie still kicked my son out of class (but not the other boy). Anyone who knows my son well, knows that a) he has a VERY strong sense of fair play and b) he takes his davening kavanah VERY seriously. This issue related to something the other child did during davening, which the rebbie mistakenly thought he saw my son doing. We were called down to the school, and after listening carefully to the rebbie’s complaint and what he had to say, we asked him what our son had said to him when accused. He basically mumbled that ALL boys say they “didn’t do it,” when confronted. So we asked him, “But is that true this time? Didn’t the boy who did it come forward immediately and admit it was he and not my son who had disrupted the davening?” By the end of the meeting, and to his credit, I will tell you the rebbie said he was sorry to my son and to us. But this affected my son’s entire feeling about the class, about learning Mishnayos and Gemarah from someone who was not FAIR and didn’t seem to even WANT to believe him. Throwing him out of class was an especially bad move.
A rebbie has a tremendous achrayus. He can make or break a yeshivah child at a crucial age when he needs to be developing a love for Torah. If someone has hurt the poster, I say let him know how you feel, with derech eretz, and be prepared to hear the other side of the story, if the rebbie is willing to offer it after all this time (though I would not hold my breath). Sometimes, it is just good to vent on paper and tear it up afterwards.