observanteen, I also have plenty of things going on besides having divorced parents. Actually, that’s one of the least of my “problems”. I just think that ultimately, a good family makes no difference. But a spouse with a wonderful personality and great character traits make all the difference in the world. But yes, it may be better for someone like her, or me, to marry someone with similar difficulties simply because they can relate better. People might think that’s considered “second rate”, but actually, for them, it’s first rate. If the person I marry cannot relate to what I went through because she comes from a perfect family, that, to me, is second rate. So when you daven for her (and it’s really sweet of you that you do), concentrate mostly that her partner should be great for her, without focusing on the family as much.
bpt, it makes me sick as well. I cannot stand the idea of a guy choosing from a list.