BPT-
“Is your friend 2nd rate because she has divorced family members?”
No she is not second rate at all but would you want your son marrying into a family that isnt a family and having to deal with all the issues that may come along with having divorced in laws? Do you want your grandchildren growing up without having another loving bubby and zaidys warm house to go to? I hate it as much as you do, but if you think about it from a different perspective, why get involved with all that if you dont have to?
“That statement galls me. The “names” are people, not satistics.”
It galls alot of people but thats the reality. Its no secret that the way our shidduch process works is less than ideal
Observantteen-
“But I still want to share my simcha with my friends…I hope I’m not annoying!”
Its very hard to be conscious of how much you speak about your chosson because you probably have your head in the clouds, but for your friends sakes and your own, try your hardest to keep it minimal. I would talk to this friend privately and try to give her chizuk and tell her youre davening for her. Also, your world just doubled- now you can help find her a shidduch because you know all these new people that your chosson and his family knows
Oomis-
“Is it HER fault that her parents couldn’t make their marriage work?”
No its not her fault but thats where Hashem put her and thats her nisayon right now. Its not someones fault if they have a mental illness either but you say that they can probably get any regular shidduch?
bombmaniac-
“name me ONE good reason why someone from a broken home is incapable of themselves building a loving home?! “
No one ever said that someone from from a broken home is incapable of building a loving one. There are a lot of other things involved other than the boy/girl themselves. most people are also looking for a nice warm loving family to join instead of a broken one that may place great stress on their lives in many areas. They also can never understand their spouse fully, having never known what a childhood like that is like. People like to marry someone with a similar background. Men and women have enough differences that its worthwhile to look for someone from the same background to minimize the differences and help shalom bayis.