You know what? I also constantly feel I have to prove myself to “them”, though I’m born and bred Chassidish. You know why? Because I’m not one of “them”. I happen to be of Poilish ancestry, not Hungarian. It’s this “us and them” mentality that you find even among the most modern, so-called “open-minded” Hungarians, NOT necessarily among Chassidim. (If you ever read “Black Becomes a Rainbow”, where the secular, Hungarian mother of a BT mentions “We blue-blooded Hungarians”, you’ll know what I mean. My friend told me her non-Chasidish, Hungarian family was non too happy with her shidduch, because her wonderful, frum T”Ch husband is Poilish, but when her cousin married a modern doctor of Hungarian descent, the family couldn’t stop exclaiming what a “heimishe” shidduch it was.) Anyway, I tell myself, these are the ones who have weathered all the storms and have remained firm in their Yiddishkeit. This is where I want to raise my kids because their Yiras Shomayim is unparalelled anywhere in chu”l. So I made peace with their narrow-mindedness and I broaden my kids’ horizons, teaching them to appreciate all ehrliche yidden, while keeping their Yiras Shomayim intact Bez”H.
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