It’s great that you have the CR to rant to but don’t take advice from anyone here. They all mean well but they don’t know you, your mother, and/or any background.
You need serious help. The mother you are describing is a very close facsimile to the type of mother that my wife is. B”H my kids (my oldest is a teenage girl) are typical & normal & happy, and they actually respect their mother. Without going in to details about my situation, serious therapy is in order and overcompensation from another source would be a tremendous help for you.
I don’t know how old you are, but the sooner you get started, the happier you’ll be.