observanteen, you are absolutly correct! i just dont think that telling these teens that they deserve death will help. and most teens dont go off the derech simply because of ta’avah – unless we are speaking of two different issues. i am reffering to the teens who go off and do drugs, get tatoos, run away from home… not the kind where the kid starts to watch movies (if he comes from a family which forbids it) or other such things.
obviousely one must have yiras shamayim – but my opinion on how to instil it is completely different from the OP.
additionally, when i say that most of these kids are subjects of abuse, i am not neccessaraly reffering to the abuse that the public hears about. these kids dont tell ANYONE what was done to them (vehamavin yavin). they feal badly enough and most blame themselves. they are hurting more than you can imagine! true they need firm discipline but with “smol docha veyamin mekarevet” they think G-d hates them – telling them that they deserve death will not make them do teshuva, they will just continue thinking that they are a lost case anyways… but if children were instilled with proper bitachon – really instilled with it – of course with yirah too, then perhaps we can prevent futer teens from going OTD.
i know 3 pple who were subject to said abuse. two went OTD and are currently getting help, and the 3rd only remained because she is one of the strongest girls i know – her bitachon is astounding, and even she struggles daily.