“I’ll keep that in mind. But seriously it’s not so simple to chill when you find out that some of your friends aren’t keeping Shabbos…”
oh so thats whats stressing you out…just last week i posted a thread about how heavily the knowledge that someone marries a goy or doesnt keep shabbos weighs on me…i completely understand.
i can tell you what my rav said, even though im still trying to work through it myself. he basically said that i shouldnt be out to change the world because i cant. i should focus on and do what i can and leave teh rest to hashem. so all i can tell you, and im telling this to myself as well, is to be understanding of your friends, encourage them when you can, inspire them when you can, be mekadesh shem shamayim when you can, but don’t feel responsible for their behaviour.
by the way, just to clarify, understanding does not equal approval. understanding means that you have listened to what they have to say, that you acknowledge their side of the issue, and that you can at the very least sympathize with it. you dont need to nor should you approve of their chillul shabbos, but the first step to helping them, if that is what you want to do, is completely understanding why they do what they do, what their thought processes are and wha ttheir feelings are. once you understand them you can try to appeal to them.
once again, im saying this to myself as well, they are not your responsibility. you can try to help them, and it would be admirable, but they are their own people and are responsible for their own actions ultimately, and they are not your responsibility.
also…GOOD FOR YOUR FRIEND! 😀 thats amazing! im glad i could be helpful, it means a lot to me 🙂