Love and Strength. It’s all we can do sometimes. Show them as much love as you show your other kids. Be happy and secure in your own yiddishkiet. And you have to be strong when people attack you, or when you read things that say it’s your fault. Or worse when your kids are flagrantly dismissive in front of you.
There is no quick fix, anything built quick, will come down quick. Be patient. I hope who ever this original poster is has much hatzlocha and strength.