We’re going to need a little more detail than that.
1. Why did you originally want to marry a learning boy? A man can be an oved Hashem even if his tachlis is not to be learning. Why did you specifically think that you wanted to marry someone whose tachlis happened to be learning?
2. Why does it bother you that you no longer want that? If it was making you unhappy to think that you would live the life of a kollel family, maybe it isn’t for you? That is ok- you can also be an ovedes Hashem even if your tachlis is to be the wife of an oved Hashem who does not learn all day.
3. You say you are losing your chashivus hatorah. What does that mean to you? What did it used to mean to you? To me, chashivus hatorah doesn’t really have anything to do with whether you are someone who will be happy learning all day, or married to someone like that. I suppose if you don’t value torah, then you certainly wouldn’t want to, but even if you value torah, it might just not be for you.