this is no doubt my weakest area in yiddishkeit as i too sorely lacked guidance into how to come up with a solution to a halachiq quandary. i obviously would seek out help from my rav first, but when he is unavailable, or im in a rush, i usually would peek into a mishna berura and see what he holds.
otherwise, is it just a big game of ‘who gives the best psaq din’?