Good points. My own marriage reflects that. My wonderful husband, is in no way a shidduch I would have sought when looking for one. He is a BT, of poshuteh parents, made a so-so living, and could not sing on key, much less well (this was something very important to me when I was much, mcuh younger). So what I got was BT who is totally dedicated to his observance of Torah, whose parents were a second set of parents to me, and truly loved me (and I them), we learned to manage on his salary plus what I earned part-time while mostly being home to raise my children, and as to the singing, Of my five children three have magnificent voices (one son is a chazzan, like my father O”H), and the other two still sound pretty good when they sing together with us, anyway.
How did we meet? I worked for a Jewish book publisher and he walked in the door one day to pick up some seforim for the man who was helping him to learn. Go know this was my basherte.